Poppy Puppy Report Westminster 2015 Day 1

Posted on February 17, 2015 at 11:06 AM

Most of us can’t be at the Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show so we settle watching  the action on TV.  Poppy Pruitt is serving as our pup on the scene with all the backstage news and insights that don’t come across your television screen.  It is time for the Poppy Puppy Westminster Report. Yesterday was the first day of competition and Poppy was busy as the breed classes were judged.  Much like fashion models or movie stars the dogs utilize all the tricks of the trade to look their best.  She wants to share some highlights from yesterday.  There were lots of brushing, teasing and primping on the benches.  A bit of a ruckus came about first thing when the Bulldog was refusing to remove his lucky belly ring.  The proctors reminded him that no jewelry was allowed.   This precedent came about a few years ago when the Afghan Hound wanted to wear a tiara and they wouldn’t let her.  It was a dog fight I tell you.  The Yorkie was having a terrible time trying to decide what color hair bow to wear.    His name is Bruce Jenner…go figure.   An official intervention occurred after the Whippet wanted to wear a Devo hat….get it whip it, whip it good!  Since relations with Cuba have improved the Havanese was caught trying to bribe a judge with some Cuban cigars and rum.  Poppy’s up close and personal view lets you in on the scoop like the fact that the Blood Hound was wearing  false eyelashes.  Of course we all pretty much knew for years that the Puli wears hair extensions.  Poppy has also confirmed something that has been long speculated upon.   Yes,  the Chow Chow is a client of the Bosley Hair Club.  She saw his membership card in his back pocket.   She also clarified why the French Bulldog always refuses to grant interviews.  She doesn’t even speak French.  She speaks Mandarin.  The Pug was almost disqualified when he was caught selling knockoff Coach leashes in the alley.  She can also confirm that the Bluetick Coon Hound is still gun shy even after months of therapy.    Poppy has also found out what the Scottish Deerhound wears under his kilt, but she’s not telling.   Animal rights protestors were boycotting the event because the Fox Hound showed up wearing a fox fur stole.  He has always been known to flaunt his wardrobe even if it is in bad taste.  There was a great deal of commotion when someone banged or clanged a metal table.  The Tibetan Spaniel thought it was time for temple.   Most people are unaware but gambling has always been a big problem at Westminster and looks like this year is no exception.  Already the Border Collie was caught holding a dice game out in the alley by the dumpster and the Italian Greyhouse was busy running a numbers game on Best of Show.  Rumors of more dishonesty arose when the Smooth Coat Chihuahua was asked to submit to a drug test.  He has long been suspected of taking steroids.  They were going to ask him to pee in a cup but they decided to have him do it in a thimble instead.  True to form the Irish Wolfhound had stopped by the pub on the way in so he was going around the room challenging everyone to a game of darts.  The Alaskan Eskimo dog almost missed her ring call.  She vacations in Florida and her plane was delayed.   The groomers were then scurrying around trying to cover up her tan lines.   In contrast the Boston Terrier showed up wearing snow shoes.  The Beagle had been pigging out on White Castles  the day before and she had to have an extender  put on her collar because it was too tight.  Did you notice how thick those ankles were on the Greyhound?  She looked like a Russian weightlifter.    She said she ate some potato chips and they always make her feet swell.  Poppy said it looked as if the Shar-Pei had just gone and got some Botox injections.   When it comes to hair there are all kinds of shady dealings.  You did know that the Standard Poodle’s pomp oms are pasties?  Well they are.  The Shih Tzu uses one of those hair Bumpits to pump up her coiffure and the Old English Sheepdog is nothing but walking hair gel!   Poppy spoke briefly with the Sheltie and true to their nature she was rather quiet and didn’t have much to say.  All this and it was only the first day.  Just wait until the cat fight starts for the Best in Show this evening.  Stay tuned and Poppy will keep you clued in behind the scenes.   

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